Blog
Browse by Categories
Weight Loss Q & A
Q: Why do I love food so much?
A: It isn’t that you love food as much as it’s that you’re not in touch with your soul (not sole) reason for wanting to eat differently. Food has one purpose . . . to provide food for your body. When you expect it to do more, calm you, soothe you, love you then you are having an unhealthy relationship with food.
Relationship Advice: The Platinum Rule
One of the things that keeps coming up with the couples I talk to is the natural tendency to want to give what we would most like to get instead of what the other person would want in that situation. I’m not talking about material gifts here; I’m talking about the responses we give to each other. We tend to imagine ourselves in the same situation and provide the solution or response we, ourselves, would want in that situation.
You Are NOT a Victim
InsideOut Empowerment Principle #10: You are not a victim of anything—not your emotions, your past, other people, circumstances, or your character. Once you learn and practice these principles of InsideOut Empowerment®, you will have the power to take a different path at any moment you choose. You have it now but you will learn to harness its use. In our society especially, there is a lot of benefit in being the victim. We have created a culture where people are no longer responsible for their own actions. Do bad things happen to good people? Of course they do but people are responsible for how they respond to those things.
John Maxwell Quote
So often we spend time comparing ourselves to others or focusing on our mistakes or our shortcomings instead of focusing on what’s right and the progress we have made. Many of us set BIG goals for ourselves and that’s as it should be because we are all capable of accomplishing great things. But it can be discouraging if all we do is look forward toward our goal noticing how much work lies ahead instead of occasionally looking behind us at how far we’re come and what has been accomplished along the way.
Book Review: Change Your Life Not Your Wife
I found this book to be equally great advice for both men and women in high powered relationships. Many relationships fall into this category of one person being over-invested in their job while the other is typically an at-home parent or homemaker, feeling alone in their marriage. This book specifically speaks to these couples.
Parenting Q & A
Q: Always love your articles Kim! But its so hard to let go of trying to control people and situations! This its especially hard as
Book Review: Contemporary Issues in Couples Counseling
I was recently honored to be asked to contribute a chapter to a book entitled, Contemporary Issues in Couples Counseling: A Choice Theory and Reality Therapy Approach. This book was written to legitimize Reality Therapy as a method of counseling for systemic issues. It’s not just for individuals.
Don’t Let Self-Sabotage Stop You
InsideOut Empowerment Principle #9: People are frequently sabotaging themselves with thinking that is outside of their conscious awareness that was likely installed at a very young age, before they were able to discriminate between truth and lies. I have been a coach for a group of high significance people who are writing books. In almost every case without exception, these people experienced self-sabotage at some point along the way. Where does it come from? It comes from the stories we tell ourselves that are based on messages that were given to us from others before we were old enough to tell the truth from lies. Mostly these early messages came from people we trusted, like our parents, teachers, relatives, and members of our spiritual community.
Pain Must Exceed Fear
InsideOut Empowerment Principle # 8: People do not change until the pain of staying the same exceeds their fear of change. You may have a superficial desire for something but until you can drill down deep enough to discover your real soul reason for wanting to make a change, it won’t happen. And then you will want to examine just how painful it will be to do nothing. Really flesh out the scenario. You want to create as much psychic pain as you can muster so you will make a change. Sometimes just wanting something is not enough. It must be more painful to do nothing than to risk the change.