July 30 is the International Day of Friendship, while July is Social Wellness Month. These two observances naturally complement each other.

Social wellness is about strengthening relationships with supportive, encouraging people and reducing time with those who criticize and drain you. Practicing Mental Freedom can prevent other people from impacting your moods negatively, but it requires energy and focus.

Social wellness becomes easier when you remove destructive influences and surround yourself with constructive, positive people. However, it’s not just about what you gain from others; it’s also about what you give. The Law of Reciprocity dictates a balance of give and take. If you only take, you won’t enjoy true social wellness because your connections will be based on what you get rather than mutual admiration, trust, and respect.

The International Day of Friendship highlights the importance of friends in our lives. As children, we reach out for friends as soon as we begin socializing. Initially, siblings and cousins may be our friends until school expands our choices.

For some, social wellness can be achieved with one person who meets all their basic needs: Safety & Security, Connection, Significance, Freedom, and Joy. This type of friendship can endure over time. Others may have an insatiable appetite for friends, collecting new ones throughout their lives, often based on convenience and proximity. Many people fall somewhere in between.

My gratitude partner shared a quote from Aristotle with me that reads, “Without friendships, no happiness is possible.” When you include family members, romantic partners, children, and even pets, I agree completely agree.

Both of my parents are in their mid-80s. My mother, more social than my father, appears to be happier. I’ve seen older people outlive their friends, leading to sadness, while others make new friends, often younger, to maintain happiness in their later years.

What value do wealth, possessions, and accomplishments have if you have no one to share them with? Without friends, it’s difficult to meet our needs. We need people who help us feel safe, connected, and valued, who give us space to be ourselves, and who share joyful moments with us.

If you lack these connections, reach out. In December, I took my father to one of his friends he hadn’t seen in 40 years, even though they lived only 10 miles apart. They had a wonderful, uplifting visit.

My mother lives in The Villages, Florida FL, which is an extremely social environment. Making friends there is almost inevitable. I visit every year and meet my mother’s new friends each time, even as my mother loses many of her former friends. Yes, losing friends is hard and sad, but it doesn’t have to mean a life without friends.

If you’re healthy and looking for friends, find a cause you support and volunteer. It gets you out of the house and around people who share your values. It’s hard to feel sorry for yourself when you’re serving others.

Don’t wait for your friends to call you. If everyone did that, no one would ever spend time with friends. Sometimes you must take the initiative. People are busy and may assume you’re fine alone. Invite people over, plan outings, or go solo and meet new people.

Make friends, keep the supportive ones, reduce time with those who drain your energy, and always be open to new friendships. Watch your social wellness improve.