The Misconception
Many people assume the most successful coaches are naturally good talkers, good advice givers and natural helpers. While those qualities can be useful, they are not what primarily makes someone an effective coach.
Many people believe helping means giving answers. Coaching often means resisting that impulse.
The best coaches don’t solve problems, direct outcomes, or position themselves as the expert in someone else’s life. Coaching is not about having all the answers or fixing people.
Great coaches are not defined by how much advice they give. They are defined by their ability to listen deeply, ask thoughtful questions, and help others think clearly.
What Actually Makes a Great Coach
Great coaches tend to possess the abilities to:
- Listen deeply
- Remain emotionally grounded
- Ask high-quality questions
- Stay unattached to outcomes
- Help others think clearly
Great coaches don’t provide answers; they help people discover their own.
The Internal Work Requirement
It is difficult to guide others somewhere you have never gone yourself. This is one reason the Board Certified Coach (BCC) ethical standards emphasize that coaches should work within areas where they have had training or personal experience.
Great coaches:
- Possess excellent self-awareness
- Manage their own triggers well, and
- Know how to reglate their own reactions
This is why Mental Freedom insists its certification candidates go through their own MFX first. We don’t want our certified people trying to help others without having experienced it for themselves.
Why This Matters
Without possessing these skills:
- Clients may develop unhealthy dependency on their coach.
- Coaches may become frustrated when clients don’t follow their advice.
- Clients may feel more “managed” than genuinely supported.
- Poor outcomes become more likely.
When coaches become too attached to outcomes, it is easy to unintentionally take over the responsibility that belongs to the client.
Mental Freedom® Connection
Mental Freedom helps counselors and coaches to understand:
- The important of taking responsibility for what belongs to them while allowing clients ownership of their own outcomes.
- The importance of preserving a client’s personal agency.
- How easily influence can become control when coaches become overly attached to results.
Given the differences that exist in basic need-strength, current situations, experiences, values, perceptions, and desires, it is important to remember that what works for you may not work for your client.
You can read more here: What Is Mental Freedom?
Invitation
If you are considering becoming a coach, you can explore our BCC-approved programs at Academy of Choice.
And if you want to experience the Mental Freedom framework personally before learning to facilitate it professionally, you may want to begin with the Mental Freedom Experience.
Reflection
What do you believe makes someone effective at helping others grow?
