Parenting: Bedtime Problems


The first situation I want to talk about
involves ten year-old Rebecca. Rebecca’s parents came to me frustrated
over the fact they were unsuccessful enforcing Rebecca’s bedtime and
she would frequently be grumpy because of lack of adequate sleep. They
also were hoping for some down time to spend some quality time with
each other without children around.

After, evaluating what was really important, the parents spoke to
Rebecca about no longer enforcing her bedtime. They explained that she
could go to bed whenever she pleased as long as she was able to get up
in the morning, get to school and be relatively pleasant with family
members. However, there would be a household quiet time that would
begin at 9 PM. At that time, everyone needed to be in his or her own
bedrooms engaged in quiet activity.

These parents couldn’t wait to tell me how great it worked! Since
Rebecca had no parents fighting with her to go to bed, she could no
longer meet her power need fighting with them. Consequently, she began
to go to bed when she got tired and stopped fighting sleep. Steve and
Mary were able to get the quiet couple time they needed so everybody

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