Love Lessons-What I’ve Learned

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I personally love the month of February because there is such a focus on love. If you know me well, you know that connection is my biggest need and love is a huge part of that. As I enter my 60th year, I spent time reflecting on the lessons of love I’ve learned along the way. I tried to list them in terms of my evolution, with early discoveries first and the most recent ones near the end. I went with 60, one lesson for each year, which doesn’t seem to be nearly enough. The following lessons aren’t just about romantic love, although there are many of those. I’m also examining love of family, friendships, possessions, self and the Divine. I hope you enjoy the read.

  1. Love is a game changer.
  2. There are many forms of love: romantic, intimate, familial, friendship, self-love and spiritual love.
  3. Love fixes everything that matters.
  4. The one love you can always count on is Divine love. It’s there whether you realize it or not.
  5. Dogs express the clearest examples of unconditional love I’ve ever encountered here on earth.
  6. Don’t take the love of your parents for granted. They won’t always be here to complain about.
  7. Siblings may be the only loved ones who have witnessed your earliest years and memories.
  8. Kindness is a path to love.
  9. Not all love lasts a lifetime.
  10. Helping someone in need while expecting nothing in return is an act of love.
  11. When you love unconditionally, there is no need for forgiveness.
  12. Do not be afraid to experience love with reckless abandon. Sure, you can get hurt, but you’re denying yourself an amazing ride.
  13. Love is not supposed to hurt. If someone who says they love you intentionally hurts you, whether physically or emotionally, that is not love, no matter what they say.
  14. It is possible to love multiple people simultaneously.
  15. Loving yourself is sometimes the hardest love of all.
  16. People may lash out at you, but continue to love them anyway.
  17. You can’t be hurt when you love unconditionally.
  18. Loving someone means you support what they want for their life, even if it makes yours harder.
  19. Not everyone can tolerate the presence of pure love in their lives, especially when they feel unworthy.
  20. We are all put on this planet to love.
  21. Kindness is never wasted, even if the person may not appreciate it. It has changed you.
  22. Loving someone sometimes means you must let them go.
  23. Having a child is the most awesome responsibility in the world and expands your love exponentially.
  24. When you discover you don’t like someone, it’s highly satisfying to find something about him or her you can connect with.
  25. Byron Katie’s book title, Loving What Is, can free you from disappointment and frustration.
  26. Wild, passionate, pheromone-driven love has a shelf-life of about two years. Decide if you want to be a serial lover chasing the high or if you want to explore what deeper, more meaningful love is all about.
  27. I am capable of loving at a distance.
  28. Romantic love tends to wax and wane. Riding out the lows and still loving each other is mature, committed love.
  29. Love is the answer to every question.
  30. Broken hearts do mend once you learn to appreciate the experience.
  31. Nature is an incredible source of love. Spend some time in it: appreciate a sunset, a waterfall, a quiet river cutting through a mountain range. It’s hard not to feel love when you are immersed in nature.
  32. Make the choice to love, even when the feeling isn’t there all the time.
  33. Hugging where hearts are together is the best kind of hug ever. Connect hearts as often as you can.
  34. A mindful hug lasts for at least three deep breaths.
  35. When you are struggling with a decision, ask yourself Kurek Ashley’s question: “How would love respond?”
  36. Having someone fall in love with you, even when you don’t return those loving feelings, is a compliment no matter who it is.
  37. Hearts have their own intelligence.
  38. You can love someone and still need to leave them.
  39. When feeling unloved, the best course of action is to become more loving.
  40. There are certain things that make my heart swell and three of them are children, puppies and kittens. They instantly put a smile on my face.
  41. No one should ever be devoid of love. We are all capable of loving ourselves, despite any childhood experiences, with the right environment.
  42. Loving means the god within you recognizes the god within the other.
  43. Love, even if it’s inconvenient.
  44. There is nothing like the love of a grandchild.
  45. I have received some of the strongest love in my life from loyal girlfriends.
  46. Having your children want to go on vacation with you—not as a babysitter or a human wallet—is an amazing experience.
  47. I believe it’s fine to love some possessions as long as you don’t develop attachment to them. The things we own are ours for a limited amount of time. Know that you could lose them, or they could be taken away, at any time. Love without strings.
  48. There are only two things in life—love and fear. If you aren’t operating in love, you are operating in fear.
  49. Change all the fears you have into love.
  50. Not everyone can see your loving intentions.
  51. Doing something good for yourself is an act of self-love.
  52. Sometimes you have to love yourself more than the person you are involved with.
  53. Love really never ends. How do I know this? I can still feel the love from people who are no longer in this world. Some days it’s palpable.
  54. It’s easy to love the people who support you; it’s not as easy to love those who challenge you, but they are making you stronger.
  55. Love of the Divine has become an essential part of my life.
  56. Loving one another will heal our divisive political climate.
  57. Loving our environment, and treating it with love, will cure the climate crisis.
  58. Love is a choice. It’s not just a feeling you have or you don’t.
  59. Love is a limitless commodity. You don’t have a limited amount that you need to ration. Be generous.
  60. When you stop searching for love and recognize you always have it inside you, you will never feel lonely again.

I’m looking forward to what I get to learn in my next 30 years or so.

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