“We have to hear our real desires, have the
courage to stand up for ourselves, and believe that our own voices are
the most important ones we will hear. It means we trust ourselves
enough to direct our own lives. . .If you get stuck with someone who
wants to contain your growth or control who you are, then you might as
well choose to be alone.”

–Sheila Ellison

I
have always believed it is best to be alone than to be with the wrong
person. This is why it is critical for individuals to know and like
themselves so they are comfortable spending time alone. When we don’t
know who we are, we may think we need a significant other to complete
us. When we don’t like who we are, we don’t enjoy our own company and
are looking for a partner to fill our time.

When
individuals make the decision to become involved in a relationship, it
should be because they have something to offer another person and
because they would like intimacy in their lives. It
should not be because they are looking for another person to “complete”
them, nor should it be because they need intimacy in their lives.

Next
time you contemplate beginning a new relationship, do it when you are
content to be alone and this relationship is simply an enhancement to
your already full life.

Why not pick up our Relationship Tip Sheet? It’s filled with great advice about how to make your relationship even better.